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June 12, 2011
Talking About The Birds and the Bees – Part 1
Pastor Philip De Courcy
Proverbs 5: 15-23

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The series That Makes Good Sense teaches from the book of Proverbs on the essential nature of godly wisdom to live life well. The series reminds believers that wisdom is about choosing to live rightly, righteously, and timely so that God is honored in all areas of life.

More From This Series


I want to begin a two-part message that will span over this morning and tonight on the subject of talking about the birds and the bees. We’ve said throughout this series in the book of Proverbs that this book is an earthy book. It deals with life in the raw and then the reality of our dearly experience, and one would imagine that a book that purports to address life in all its practical dimensions is a book that’s going to address the issue of purity, and it does and it does it in quite an extensive manner. In fact, Proverbs five, six and seven in large measure deal with the whole issue of moral behavior and sexual purity, and I want to spend a bit of time today across this day looking at this issue for the benefit of all. We’re going to read Proverbs five verse 15 through to verse 23.
Having warned his son about the danger and the peril of the immoral woman, Solomon encourages his son to rejoice in the wife of his youth. He says this, “Drink water from your own well and running water from your own well, should your fountains be dispersed abroad, streams of water in the streets, let them be only your own and not for the strangers with you. Let your fountain be blessed and rejoice with a wife of your youth as a loving dear and a graceful doe. Let her breasts satisfy you at all times and always be enraptured with her love for why should you, my son, be enraptured by the immoral woman and be embraced in the arms of a seductress? The ways of a man are before the eyes of the Lord and he ponders all his paths, his own inequities entrap the wicked man and he has caught in the cords of his sin. He shall die for lack of instruction and in the greatness of his folly, he shall go astray.” Trust God will bless his word.
Once upon a time there was a man who visited a community of people who lived by a river. As evening approached, he was invited to sit down by the river and enjoy something to eat and something to drink with these river people. While they calmly and pleasantly enjoyed their food and company, a 14-foot crocodile suddenly come up out of the water, chomped off the arm of a man sitting closest to the riverbank and then slipped silently back into the dark and murky waters of the river.
The people were alarmed and shocked, but they quickly recomposed themselves. The man who had been injured was bandaged up and transported to the medical center that wasn’t far away, but to the surprise of the visitor and traveler, the majority of people quickly resumed their eating and drinking and conversation, just kind of picked up where they left off.
The traveler was horrified at the sight of the man being bitten and then this return to normalcy after such a tragic and violent act. He, in fact at times tried to bring the subject up, but he found that those around the ring who were eating and drinking quickly changed the subject and made it clear to him that they didn’t want to talk about it. The man became frustrated, in one final attempt he said, “Did nobody see that? I mean, did I imagine a man just got bitten by a 14-foot crocodile?” Finally, someone in the group addressed him directly and said, “Oh, we saw what happened. A number of people are attacked each year in our community by crocodiles.”
That caused the man to look around the group a little bit more intently, and he spotted that there were people sitting around the campfire whose hands were missing, whose feet were missing, there were fingers and ears missing. The man said, “Can’t you do anything about the crocodiles?” Another man in the group with embarrassment clearly written across his face answered him with these words. “It’s impolite in our culture to talk about crocodiles.” The traveler was stunned into bewildered silence.
That story to me is a parable of how at times the church has addressed and dealt with the issue of sex and the issues that surround it. An impolite and godly company, it is not a subject to be talked about, and yet the crocodiles are wounding and maiming people emotionally and psychologically as it relates to this issue of sexual intimacy and activity. Yet nobody in the church seems to want to address the issues. Sex is an off-limits subject not to be discussed in polite company, let alone in the holy company of the saints.
While I understand fully that this is a sensitive issue, is an issue that ought to be addressed with a certain decorum and dignity, I nevertheless disagree with such an approach. The word of God doesn’t blush to address this issue. The prophets and the apostles of God have written extensively on this issue and therefore it is an issue that ought not to be cloaked in a code of silence. It is not an issue that ought to be addressed with embarrassment. God created sex and when we was finished on that first week, he said it was good.
And Solomon is a father here in Proverbs chapter five, six and seven believes that also, he believes it’s absolutely appropriate and it’s absolutely necessary for him to address this issue with his children openly, honestly, and biblically and urgently. As we come to Proverbs five, six and seven, we have a parent talking about the birds and the bees to his sons.
In the light of the collapsing culture, in the light of a philosophy of free love that was becoming accepted in Israeli society, Solomon believed that it was a matter of pressing urgency and moral clarity that he sits down with his son and gives him a talk about the gift, the peril and the joy of sex. I think Solomon understood that if he didn’t teach his son the right view of these things, society at large would teach him the wrong view of these things.
Solomon understood that right behavior begins with right thinking, and Solomon didn’t want his son thinking about sex from the context of a warped and crooked culture. For this man and this parent, there was no separation of sexuality and spirituality. Solomon believed in sex education so long as that education involved the right teacher, the right classroom and the right curriculum. The right teacher being a godly parent, the right classroom being the home and the right curriculum being the word of God itself.
And so I want to help parents this morning, myself included. I want to challenge our young people this morning concerning this issue and before we go any further, in fact, I want to just stop and pause and encourage parents here this morning to take seriously their obligation to teach their sons and daughters regarding these matters. It’s imperative that you do this. Don’t leave it to the society, don’t leave it to your child’s own experimentation. Sit them down at the right time, in the right seasons in their life and help them come to grips with the biblical view of this issue.
In fact, just by way of further introduction, let me say four things to parents as it regards this matter of sex education and your children. Number one, be bold. Do not be embarrassed. Speak candidly. Speak appropriately, but speak forthrightly to your teenage children about this issue. Don’t cloak it in a code of silence. The Bible speaks to this issue on numerous occasions. God doesn’t blush and you don’t need to be embarrassed.
And as you address this issue bravely and boldly with your children, let your conversation be marked by reverence and let it be marked by sensitivity. In reference to reverence, we live in a gutter culture. We live in a culture that demeans the sanctity of marriage. We live in a culture that defaces the beauty of sex and sexuality, and as you address this issue with your child, speak with a certain dignity, help them to understand that this is an appropriate subject to talk about, but it’s sacred, it’s beautiful, it’s holy, and the conversation will be marked by that particular perspective.
In reference to sensitivity, look out for those times when your child naturally discovers the opposite sex. During those years of puberty and physical development, when they begin to explore their own sexuality, be sensitive to that, be aware of it, be alert to it, be proactive, be preemptive and have those answers ready to those questions that are coming. Don’t leave it to the society, don’t leave it to some secular professor. Don’t leave it to your child’s unguarded heart. Be bold, be candid. Get ready for this important role that God has given you towards your children.
Let your description be accurate and let your depictions be real. The temptations are real, but they can be overcome by God’s grace and the knowledge of true love. Listen to these words from Howard Hendrix. He said this, “Parents often conduct sex education like preoccupied motorists. They sail right past the stop signs and they sit like stalled cars in front of the green lights.” Be ready, be open, be sensitive. Look for those teachable and appropriate moments in your child’s life. I like the story that Howard Hendrix goes on to give in relation to what he just said about the little boy who asked his mother where he came from as a child and his mother gave him a tall tale about a beautiful white feathered bird.
The little boy ran into the next room and asked his grandmother the same question and he got a variation of the bird story. He went outside and started talking to his little playmate, Jimmy, and he made this comment, “I just learned this morning that there hasn’t been a normal birth in our family for three generations.” When the kids are going to discover, they’re going to think they’re going to act. Be preemptive, be proactive, be bold. Take the word of God, ask the Holy Spirit to give you help to speak candidly, appropriately, reverentially and sensitively to your child and get them ready. Get them ready for the joy of sex as God promised it and planned it in the word of God. Be bold.
Secondly, be biblical. That sounds like a no-brainer, but I want you to understand when we talk about sex education, we’re not talking as Christians [inaudible 00:12:34] biological lesson. The identification of body parts and the act in itself in some isolated form. No, when we talk about biblical sex education, we’re talking about a theological discourse. We’re talking about helping our children to think biblically, to think Christianly, to act in a freedom framework of theological reality. That means that when you sit down to talk about the birds and the bees, you’re going to talk about your child’s body, how it’s created in the image of God, the purpose for which it was given, the functions to which it ought to be applied. You’re not only going to talk about their bodies, you’re going to talk about love.
What is love? Is it an impulse? Is it goosebumps? Is it a chill down the spine? Is it losing yourself in the presence of another person? What is love? Well, it is elements of that. It is emotional but biblically love begins with the will. It begins with surrender. It begins with understanding how God loved us in Jesus Christ and his incarnation. His life is death. There’s resurrection, his selflessness.
You help your child to understand what it means to love somebody. You help them to understand what is the appropriate behavior towards the opposite sex because they’re going to come on a point in their life where they’re going to get attracted to the opposite sex. It’s really natural, but the word of God says, “How do you treat a young woman if you’re a young man? How do you treat a young man if you’re a young woman? How aught you to dress? How aught you to speak, how want you to act?” The Bible says that the young man of the church ought to treat the young women of the church like their sisters. There’s all sorts of verses that help our young men and young women know how to handle themselves in each other’s company.
You need to teach that. You need to be bold, you need to be biblical. You need to teach your young people gender roles. This is all in the orbit of sexuality. The body, behavior towards the opposite sex, gender roles. Are the fathers of our congregation preparing their young man to be humble, but courageous leaders when God gives them a wife and blesses them with children? Has he taught them the ethic of hard work and responsibility of sacrificing, of not being passive but trying to think through what is best for my wife, my child? Is that son at home now beginning to handle responsibility? Does he like to do chores about the home? Does he get up and get on with it knowing that someday he will be responsible for a whole family unit himself?
And are the young women of our church being taught by their mothers, the high calling of motherhood, one of the greatest events in their life will be to bear children and then give themselves selflessly at home to those children. Are the mothers of our church helping their daughters to think through the issues of career as it opposes the home. All sorts of things to teach on this. It’s not just a one dimensional issue, it’s not a biological lesson. It’s a theological discourse.
Are we going to sit down and help our young people and our children think through the one flesh issue? What’s involved in sexual union? It’s got tremendous physical psychological factors to it. It’s a spiritual act. It unifies a home. It brings intimacy and comfort to a couple. It’s a wonderful thing at the right time, in the right place with the right person. Be bold, be biblical. We need to furnish sex information as needed with a Christian interpretation to our children.
Thirdly, be believable. Be believable. The best sex education any child can ever receive is to have a mother and father who are hopelessly in love with each other, who are not frightened to show affection, who help their child see in a biblical way there is a physical component to love, that mom and dad are a true physical counterpart to each other. How do young people catch a biblical view of these things? Well, just like chickenpox, you expose them to it. Parents need to teach, but they also need to live what they teach. Nothing builds a stronger foundation for holy, healthy sexuality in your child’s life and my child’s life than them to know that his or her parents are hopelessly and helplessly and abandonly in love with each other, that romance is fun, that these things have their proper place.
Listen to these words from Douglas Wilson in his book Reforming Marriage, “There is a sexual relationship at the center of the home which should be obvious to all who live there, hugs, kisses and romantic attention. There’s nothing wrong with children knowing that their father is male and their mother is female and that they should have a sexual relationship. There is something wrong when they don’t know.”
I think we see this kind of approach in Solomon here and it’ll become apparent as we finish the exposition this morning and this evening. Solomon was bold, Solomon was biblical and Solomon was believable. Well, that could be qualified in another sense because one of the tragedies of Solomon is that one of the ways he taught his son, sadly, was through teaching them good lessons from a bad example, which does remind me by the way, as a footnote, that should you have failed in this area as a parent, that should not stop you teaching your child the proper view of sex and the right perspective on marriage.
Solomon certainly brought a certain reality to these words in that his sons would know the price he paid for not following the advice he was about to give to them. Solomon didn’t learn lessons from the bad example of his parents, David, but he’s hoping that his sons will learn good lessons from his bad examples. George Lawson, the commentator says, “The wisdom which Solomon teaches in this chapter cost him dear, but if we attend to his instruction, we shall have them at an easy rate.”
Finally, by way of introduction, just reminding parents of the urgent need to help their children have moral clarity on these issues, be bold, be biblical, be believable, be balanced. What do I mean by that? Well, when you’re teaching your child sexual boundaries and mores of conduct and behavior, use the carrot and the stick approach. Sometimes you need to use the stick. You need to remind them that if you do this, here’s the consequences, and Solomon does that vividly as he paints on the canvas of chapters five, six, and seven, a vivid picture of what happens when you fall into the arms of the seductress, the physical penalty, the emotional pain and the financial heart, the spiritual damage.
It’s all there and he kind of uses the stick. There’s warnings, there’s prohibitions, there’s censorship, and that has its place. Don’t do thou shall not, is an approach that is appropriate, but he not only uses the stick, he uses the carrot approach also. He talks about the rewards of obedience as well as the cost of rebellion. We’re going to see tonight, and I’ve left it for tonight purposefully because in Proverbs five 15 through 20, he talks about the joy of sex as God intended it within the context of a covenant between a man and woman who monogamously live with each other all their days in purity and fidelity. And he wants his sons to know, “Hey, why would you drink a glass of dirty water,” that is illicit sex, “when you can have a crystal clear glass of true sex in the context of marriage?”
And so he’s wetting in his child’s appetite. He saying, “Look, don’t do this because you can have this,” and there’s a balance. And sometimes we as believers often focus on the negative aspects of this doctrine rather than exciting our children about the positive benefits of obedience. He does not simply repress, he excites. In fact, in proverb six, verse 27, Solomon likens sexual activity to fire and I think fire is a great illustration of what we’re talking about. In fact, Paul uses that image, doesn’t he, in First Corinthians seven verse nine, he talks about the burning in a young person, the sexual appetite, the drives that are natural, they need to be controlled and expressed biblically.
In fact, Paul says, “Better to marry than to burn.” I think Solomon by implication is encouraging young people if they truly believe that they’re in love with each other and they want to marry, the sooner, the better. Why leave themselves exposed to sexual temptation when that is unnecessary? So there’s this burning, this fire that reaches within and like fire, there’s a balance.
Fire can be enjoyed or fire can be dangerous. Sex can be enjoyed or sex can be a peril and a danger. You can sit on a winter’s night by your hearth with the fire where it’s meant to be and enjoy it. It’s very inviting. It’s warm. It creates a beautiful atmosphere in the home and if it wasn’t for the gas prices, I think June and I would’ve enjoyed an awful lot more. But you take that fire out of that hearth and you put it in the living room floor, it’ll burn your house down. Fire is dangerous. We need to warn our children about not playing with fire. But fire is beautiful. It creates steam that drives engines. It creates beautiful atmospheres. It’s mesmerizing the watch as the flames dance within the hearth of the fire. So be bold, be biblical, be believable, be balanced.
Well, let’s look at one of three things I want to cover today because the Solomon sits down and gives his son here a talk about the birds and the bees, he wants him to dig three trenches from which he might fight fleshly lust which wars against the soul. Those are the words of Peter in first Peter two, verse 11. You and I are in a daily fight for holiness. You and I are constantly having to battle to maintain our purity because fleshly lusts war against our souls. If you’re a young Christian or not so long in the faith and you’re surprised that you’re fighting with sin, don’t be, don’t be, because the spirit of God is jealous over our spirit and there’s a war concerning who will have that proper place in our lives.
It must be God, it must be his word, and therefore, you and I must consciously engage this issue so that we live under God’s will and according to God’s plan. And so Solomon writes to his son here and tells him, look, in this issue of sex and sexuality, I want you to think about three things. Number one, there’s a call to submission. We’ll look at that in eye for about 15 minutes or so, and then tonight we’re going to look at a call to separation and a call to satisfaction. Two are negative, one is positive.
As you look at this kind of balance of approach, let’s look at the call to submission. As Solomon encourages his son to avoid the arms and the embraces of the seductress, his first angle of attack is the heart. He goes for his son’s heart. Turn over actually to Proverbs 23 verse 26 and then we’ll come back into Proverbs five, six and seven.
Here’s this call to submission. He says to his son, “Pin back your ears,” and he says, “My son, give me your heart. Give me your heart and let your eyes observe my way as for a harlot is a deep pit and a seductress as a narrow well, she also lies in wait for a victim and increases the unfaithful among men.” The wise teacher here emphasizes that purity must be planted in the heart first and foremost. Solomon says, “Give me your heart.” That’s a Hebrew word that actually encompasses the whole idea of the mind, the emotions, the will.
Solomon is saying to his son, look, regarding these three aspects of your personality and personhood, we’ve got to get them aligned. Your mind and your heart and your will have got to work in concert and each of them have got to submit themselves to what I’m about to say. I’m going to set before you the path of wisdom which leads to life. I’m going to give you truth concerning sex and sexuality, and you’ve got to buy the truth and sell it not. You’re not to experiment for yourself. You’re not to take your cue from the culture, you’ve got to listen to your father. What I’m about to say you’ve got to submit to because your purity and your ultimate satisfaction is bind up in you listening to what I’m about to say. So give me your mind, control your emotions, and offer your will to follow what I’m about to say.
Because listen, folks, a person will do on the outside what? They will do on the side what they have committed themselves to on the inside. That’s why the book of Proverbs tells us in Proverbs 4:23 to guard our hearts for it is the wellspring of life itself. What you think about what you allow your emotions to get attached to will ultimately have a say in what you do. Therefore, the battle for purity interestingly involves a call to submission.
Now, go back to Proverbs five, one and two and you’ll see this repeated. I’ll just read some of these verses. Take some time to reflect on them later today. “My son, pay attention to my wisdom.” Five verse one, “Lend your ear to my understanding that you may preserve discretion and your lips may keep knowledge, for the lips of an immoral woman drip honey and are Martha smoother than oil, but in the end she’s bitter.”
Look at Proverbs six, verse 20, “My son, keep your father’s command and do not forsake the law of your mother. Bind them continually upon your heart. Tie them around your neck. When you roam, they will lead you when you sleep, they will keep you when you awake, they will speak with you.” Verse 23, “For the commandment there’s a lamp and the law is a light where proofs of instruction or the way of life to keep you from the evil woman.”
I want you to notice here the connection between what the father says and the law. Don’t be thinking as we’ve said, this is some kind of secular biological lesson that Solomon’s giving his son regarding sex and sexuality. No, he’s sitting him dying and the law and the commandment of which he speaks concerning the father and the mother is the law and the commandment of God himself.
He’s being bold and he’s being biblical and he’s being balanced here with his son and he’s calling his son to submit. Look at verse one of chapter seven, “My son, keep my words and treasure my commands within you. Keep my commandments and live and my law as the apple of your eye. Bind them on your fingers, write them on the tablet of your heart. Say to wisdom, you are my sister and call understanding your nearest kin that they may keep you from the immoral woman.”
What’s going to keep this boy from sexual temptation and failure by listening, remembering, acting upon what his father has taught him from the word of God. And here’s what I want you to get from this men, women, and young people, the first line of defense in the battle for purity is a renewed mind, a mind that’s constantly being renewed by the word of God, constantly being washed and bathed in the scriptures. Paul says to the Romans, “I besieged you by the mercies of God, do not be conformed to this world, be renewed in your mind.”
See, ideas of consequences, thoughts are important. You and I need to think that through, you and I need to feed upon the bread of God’s word or else we will be reduced to a crust of bread by the immoral woman. Look at proverb six verse 26, “For by means of a harlot, a man is reduced to a crust of bread and an adulterous will pray upon its precious life.” If you and I don’t think biblically and don’t act theologically, if we don’t feed upon the bread and the manner of God’s word, we are opening our lives to the world and if we are not careful, we can be brought to look like a crust of bread. Our life will be in a shambles because we haven’t submitted ourselves on a daily basis to the word of God. We haven’t treasured it up in our hearts, allowing it to shout to our conscience, to resist temptation and to fortify our hearts and minds to say no to sin because we’ve got good reasons to say no.
What’s the point? The point is this, sexual sin begins in the mind. I want you to hear that again. Sexual sin begins in the mind. Therefore, we’ve got to stop it where it starts, in the mind. That’s why this father three times vigorously, vividly says to his son, “Pin your ears back. Get your antenna up. Open the gate to your heart. Swing open the door to your mind because I’ve got truth that needs to get in there and it’s got to stay there. You’ve got to keep it there and every day you’ve got to think about it and act upon it, otherwise you’ll fall into this woman’s arms and her dragnet will draw you away from God.”
Sexual sin begins in the mind. Didn’t Jesus teach us that? Over in Matthew five, the Lord Jesus Christ in the sermon in the mind says these words. Matthew five, verse 27, “You have heard it said by those of old, you shall not commit adultery, but I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with his heart. If your eye causes you to sin, pluck it out and cast it from you.”
Jesus is telling us that sexual sin begins in the mind. Our minds are the greatest sexual organ in our body because our mind stimulates us to act in certain ways. If we give full rein to our thoughts, our mind will make choices for us. Our choices will develop character and our character will determine the quality of our lives and ultimately our eternal destiny.
You see, Jesus is saying here that before a man gets into bed with a woman, if his eyes lust after her, he will mentally undress her in an anticipated act in his mind, the act itself will be preceded by mental engagement, which is often triggered by verbal or visual words or suggest of thoughts. In fact, that’s why it’s interesting that Solomon connects spoken words and suggestive thoughts to sexual sin.
Did you notice that? Look at chapter two in verse 16, speaking of the immoral woman, Solomon says this, “The seductress who flatters with her words, who forsakes the companion of our youth and forgets the covenant of our God.” Look at chapter five and verse three. “For the lips of the immoral woman drip honey and her mouth is smoother than oil.” Look at proverb seven verse five, “That they may keep you from the immoral woman, from the seductress who flatters with her words.” And if you skip over to chapter 22 in verse 14, you’re going to see this. “The mouth of an immoral woman is a deep pit. He who is adored by the Lord will fall there.”
It’s interesting to me here you have this woman, she’s seductively dressed, she’s beating and badgering the young man of Israel to come and lie with her, and yet if you read this passage, Solomon concentrates often on her mouth, her lips, because you see, she’s going to engage the young man’s mind ever before she get her hands around his body. She’s going to engage him verbally, she’s going to entice him visually and it’s going to begin up here. This is the greatest sexual organ, the mind, and what it thinks about it makes choices about, and its choice leads to character and character depending on what character has consequences.
I want you to write something down and think about it. If you really think about this in a sense, you can talk your way and you can think your way out of sexual sin or you can talk your way and think your way into sexual sin. That’s why it’s vitally important that we think about what we think about, that if you’re a businessman and you’re on the road, you’ve got to make some choices ever before you step into the lobby of the hotel because you know there’s cable on the fifth floor in your room, which is an inlet to tremendous temptation.
You’ve got to think and you’ve got to act out of a context where your mind is submitted to the word of God and the dictates and the commandments of God’s precious will for our lives because it is there. There is satisfaction and see if they are minds are a powerful ally in the war against sexual temptation. Proverbs 23 verse seven, “As a man thinks, so is he.”
Our thoughts are critical. Our thoughts are critically determine the direction of our lives and the decisions we make on a daily basis. Our thoughts are critical and therefore Christians need to be critical thinkers. Everybody needs to be a critical thinker. You need to be reading the word of God. You need to be studying this subject. You need to have a rationale for your behavior that’s rooted in the word of God. That’s why not to be theological is to expose yourself to sexual temptation, not to read the word of God on a daily basis is to open the portal of your life for the world to rush in.
You’ve constantly got to be barricading your mind and your hearts with biblical thoughts. You’ve got to direct your mind because your mind will end up directing you. Second Corinthians 10 verse five, what does Paul say? He says, “Bring every thought into captivity.” That’s a job, isn’t it? Meaning in this culture with billboards and internet and television, sex is selling everything. Sex can be bought everywhere. To every day get up and as Paul says, “Guard your mind, put on the helmet of salvation and say, ‘Today I need to be alert. I need to be alive. The world is never far away. My heart is a traitor and I need to be thinking and therefore acting the way God would want me to think and act.'”
And you’re not going to do that without a fight. You’re not going to do that without discipline. You’re not going to do that if three hours of your day are spent sitting before a television and you spend 15 minutes in the word of God, it’s just not going to be able to be achieved. We need to renew our minds by bathing them in the sin killing, life issuing word of God. We need to bring our thoughts under the domination of the spirit and the word. That’s how Jesus battled temptation. That’s how Jesus secured victory. Jesus was able to rebut the advances of sin and the arguments of sin. You know that when he was tempted in the wilderness, Satan comes to him and he advances an argument. “Here’s what you need to do, Jesus. Here’s what will happen. I’d encourage you to do it.” And Jesus rebuts the advance of sin and he rebuts the argument of sin with other arguments. It is written, I can’t do that. I won’t do that. There’s no wisdom in doing it.
I’m not going to tempt the Lord. I’m not going to give up the eternal joy that I’ve had and will have with the Father to bend the need to you and the broken societies of this world. That’s no inheritance for me. Jesus reasoned in the context of temptation. So many Christians talk about giving into their emotions and giving into their impulses. Why is that? Because they don’t think enough. Their emotions are dominating, not their mind, their libido rather than their mind and their heart and their will in alignment to the word of God, acting in submission to God’s call upon their lives to be pure for it is the will of God that we abstain from sexual immorality.
I think my mother was right and yours too probably. This book will keep you from sin or sin will keep you from this book, and that’s what Solomon is saying to his son. He’s telling him not to be a simpleton, not to act emotionally, not to react impulsively, but to act rationally. He, in fact, gives him an example. We don’t have time to read it. In proverb seven verse six of a young man who unwittingly, unwisely walks down a certain street in a certain part of the time, bumps into a lady of the night and finds himself where he shouldn’t find himself doing what he shouldn’t be doing. And look at how Solomon describes that. “Forgot the window of my house. I looked through my lattice and I saw among the simple, I perceived among the youths, a young man devoid of understanding.”
How did this young man fall into the arms of the seductress described in proverb seven? Read it. It is very suggestive. It is very raw, real. Why? Because he didn’t think and he got himself into all kinds of trouble.
Our minds, as we close, must be constantly rehearsing biblical truths regarding sex and sexuality. We must on a daily basis win the argument with sin, we’ve got to constantly rehearse that sex is good and that it is a gift from a good God to his creation. But just like everything in God’s creation, it’s to be enjoyed in his time, in his way. It’s a good thing, but it’s only good when it’s done according to the will of God.
I got to keep constantly rehearsing that because the world tells me it’s a good thing anytime and in any way. It’s not. It’s ugly, it’s grotesque, and it’s morally repugnant. Oh, holy God. I’ve got to constantly rehearse that this body of mine is not for immorality, but for God. First Corinthians six, verse 13. I just can’t do with my body what it impulsively wants to do. I’ve got to subdue the old man.
I’ve got to crucify the flesh. I’ve got to surrender this body to the will of God by the help of the spirit of God. I can do it. I ought to do it. I must do it. And I’ve got a constantly day by day remind myself, I am going to beat this body into sub subjection just like Paul in first Corinthians nine. I’m going to train this body of mine to do what God wants it to do. And you know what? I’m not left by myself to do that. The power of the indwelling Holy Spirit can be supplied to me as I surrender and repent.
I need to remember that it’s deadly to fantasize about sexual sin. Romans chapter eight, verse six says, “To be carnally minded is death, to be spiritually minded is life.” I’ve got the concert of mind myself that should I move that mouse and click on that window and go to a certain website that I am dealing in death on a daily basis in my life. I’m destroying my purity. I’m scarring my mind. I’m bringing a barrier between my wife and I. I’m robbing myself of what’s pure and wholesome and holy, and I’ve got to do that every day because the world and the flesh and the devil don’t take vacations.
And I’ve got to constantly rehearse the arguments for why I must not sin in this area. I’ve got to remind myself of the heavy cost of compromise in this matter. Take some time today, read Proverbs five verses three through 15. Read Proverb six, verse 25 through 27. We’ll just read those. Here’s what it says. “Do not lust after her beauty in your heart,” proverb 6 25, “nor let her allure you with her eyelids for by means of a harlot, a man is reduced to a crust of bread and an adulteress will pray upon its precious life. Can a man take far to his bosom and his clothes be not burned? Can one walk on hot coals and his feet be not seared? So is he that to his neighbor’s wife who touches her, he shall not be innocent.”
And it goes on to talk about the ramifications physically, psychologically, financially, socially, spiritually, eternally. Look, let’s remind ourselves this morning, listen, listen, listen. There are no bargain-basement prices when it comes to sin. We will pay and pay dearly. We will rock our marriage. We will hurt our children. We will win the body of Christ. We will cause the world to laugh and mock our savior and we will make light of the cross because these are the sins. This is the behavior that Jesus died to forgive me of and to take out of my life. Got to keep rehearsing that though, it’s a battle. It’s tough, isn’t it? I know how tough it is. You know how tough it is, and we need to pray more for our young people.
The society they’re growing up in gives them no time to think purely. They’ve got to always be on a rear guard action against the world, constantly badgering them to use their body for something other than God has intended. A world that is teaching all forms of marriage as normative, a world that’s exploiting women in their natural bodily beauty on the internet. It’s being sold like it’s a packet of sweets. It’s a tough world to be holy in. One of the ways we can remain holy, we can stay pure, is to have our mind guarded and guarded by those kind of thoughts.
Let me finish with this story and we’ll be done. On May 26th, 1941, a strange event occurred in the history of the German submarine, U566. It was an incident that had a profound effect on the future naval engagements of the Second World War. The commanding officer of U566 was a Lieutenant Wolforth. His U-boat was returning from some successful kills in the mid-Atlantic from against some British merchant ships.
When the lookout spotted in the horizon two enemy war ships, that caused the U-boat to crash dive severely and quickly. It then resurfaced a little bit later and with a sweep of the periscope, they couldn’t believe their eyes. It was a skipper’s dream. They found themselves smack dab between two enemy warships. To the front of the U-boat was the British battleship, the renowned. To the rear of the submarine was the British aircraft carrier, the Ark Royal. I mean, you couldn’t have wanted anymore. And if you know anything about submarines, you’ll know that they can fire torpedoes out of the front and fire torpedoes out of the back.
And this lieutenant aboard this U-boat thought to himself, “One stone, I’m going to kill two ugly birds.” And so he gave the order for the torpedoes to be launched. The only problem was there were no torpedoes left. They used them all in the killing of the merchant ships and sailors. Disappointed, they dived. What an opportunity was missed, an opportunity that would’ve dramatically affect the war because as he looked through the periscope, he noticed on the deck of the Ark Royal, a couple of planes were being fueled for takeoff. One of those plans was fueled. It took off from the deck of the Ark Royal and one hour later, it spotted the Bismarck. I mean, that was the ace card in the naval dock of the German forces.
It had wreaked havoc among the British navy. This plane dropped a torpedo that immobilized the rudder of the Bismarck, didn’t sink the ship, just caused it that it wasn’t able to sail anymore and there it sat. It radioed back the information with the coordinates. And before long, the British planes were bombing the Bismarck to a point that was not out of the war. Giving the British and the Allied Forces a great upper hand.
You say, pastor, what’s the point of the story? The point of the story is this, that you and I can find ourselves in a context where we’re engaging the enemy and the enemy is engaging us. And when those moments come, you better be ready for a fight. You better have a round in the chamber. You better have your sights set correctly. And yet the problem is, ladies and gentlemen, as we close, too many Christians find themselves smack dab in the middle of sexual temptation and there’s nothing in their tubes.
They haven’t filled their mind with the word of God. They haven’t been on spiritual alert. They haven’t walked in this spirit day by day. They haven’t rehearsed on a regular basis why they need to stay pure. Not only because there’s the cost of disobedience, but there’s the awards of obedience and they become prey to the enemy. Or at best, they just don’t wretch up a spiritual victory. They just kind of disappear again. This is a tremendous challenge to us, and I pray that you and I will heed what these sons of Solomon are being asked to heed. First of all, the call to submission.