So, let’s take our bibles tonight and then turn to Genesis 45 as we come back for a second time to look at Joseph mending the fences with his brothers. Joseph is extending forgiveness and reconciliation towards his brothers, and you and I want to learn some great lessons about forgiveness from this dramatic chapter within the story of Joseph. Genesis 45 in verse one, “Then Joseph could not restrain himself before all those who stood by him and he cried out, “Make everyone go out from me.” So, no one stood with him while Joseph made himself known one to his brothers and he wept aloud and the Egyptians in the house of Pharaoh heard it. Then Joseph said to his brothers, “I am Joseph. Does my father still live?” But his brothers could not answer him for they were dismayed in his presence. And Joseph said to his brothers, “Please, come near to me for they came near.””
“So, they came near. Then he said, “I am Joseph, your brother, whom you sold into Egypt. But now do not therefore be grieved or angry with yourselves because you sold me here. For God sent me before you to preserve life. For these two years, the famine has been in the land and there are still five years in which there will be neither plowing nor harvesting. And God sent me before you to preserve a posterity for you and the earth and to save your lives by a great deliverance. So, now it was not you who sent me here but God and he has made me a father to Pharaoh and lord of all his house and a ruler throughout all the land of Egypt. Hurry and go up to my father and say to him, “Thus says, your son Joseph: God has made me Lord over all Egypt. Come down to me. Do not tarry. You shall dwell in the land of Goshen and you shall be near me, your children, your flocks, and your herds, and all that you have. There, I will provide for you, lest you and your household and all that you have come to poverty.”
What a scene as Joseph and his brothers are reunited and reconciled, mending the fences. It’s rarely our experience, as was the experience of former British Prime minister, William Gladstone, who wrote in an early letter to his wife, quote, “I seem hardly to have any daily pressure. No strokes from God, and no opportunity for pardoning others, for none offends me.” I think we’d like a slice of that pie, but from where many of us sit tonight, that does seem a little pie in the sky, a little too idyllic to be true. No strokes from God. No opportunity to pardon. Hardly a daily pressure.
It is indeed a rare thing in life to find peace in all fronts, to have God’s uninterrupted smile and people’s unending embrace. It’s more often the case on a daily basis that we need God to forgive us and others need us to forgive them. Unlike William Gladstone, it seems that we have plenty of opportunities to forgive, don’t we? But forgiveness is not easy. When we get hurt, we want to strike out. If others make us suffer, we want to make them suffer. Why should we forgive, we ask ourselves, and make their life easy when they meet our lives so hard?
I think you and I have got to a certain place in life at times where forgiveness seems weak, unjust, and unfair. In fact, surely in forgiveness the victim is victimized the second time in that they have to pay yet another price in the cancellation of the debt or the removal of the offense. That doesn’t seem just towards the unjust. That’s why C.S. Lewis said, “Forgiveness is a beautiful word, until you have someone or something to forgive.” Charles Swindoll said, “If we’re honest, we would rather sit on a judgment seat than a mercy seat. That is honest, isn’t it? There’s a lot of Dirty Harry in all of us. We want our pound of flesh. In fact, one cynic claimed that since there are more lawyers in America than doctors, that proves that most Americans are more interested in getting even than getting well.
But life will present us with many opportunities to forgive. Although not easy to forgive, we must forgive. Because forgiveness is the trademark of Christianity. Forgiveness is the birthmark of Christians. Forgiveness is the obligation of the forgiven. Write that down and think about it. The forgiveness of God toward us is not just to be rejoiced in but reproduced. Forgiven people must be forgiving people. Isn’t that Paul’s whole argument in Ephesians 4:32? “Forgive one another as God in Christ Jesus has forgiven you.” Is there not a hint of that … ‘ey, more than a hint of that in the Lord’s prayer? When the Lord encourages us to pray, “Forgive us our debts as we forgive others.” Our forgiveness of others is predicated upon God’s forgiveness of us. Forgiven people must be forgiving people. Forgiveness is an obligation of the forgiven. Not to forgive is to burn the bridge over which we ourselves must cross.
That said, then let’s take a leaf from the pages of Joseph’s life. Let’s return to this part of the story in our ongoing series in the life of Joseph, and let’s look at what we said the last time might constitute Joseph’s supreme temptation. Would he forgive his brothers? Of all the challenges that Joseph faced, is this not the supreme challenge? But what we find in him is a clear and concrete example of biblical forgiveness. We find back in chapter 42, Joseph’s brothers traveling down to Egypt because the famine had spread and they come down to get some food from Egypt. They don’t realize that the person they’re dealing with is their brother. And so here we have a series of events that will trigger the reunion and the reconciliation between Joseph and his brothers. And I think you and I want to take a leaf from Joseph’s book when it comes to reconciliation, when it comes to mending the fences, when it comes to restoring, fractured and broken relationships.
And we saw that there were kind of three planks in the process of mending fences. We saw the last time we were together that their sins were to be faced. The whole process begun with confrontation. Joseph confronts his brothers. He gives them a little taste of their own medicine. Remember, we argued that. He charges them with being spies, kind of takes us back to their angst towards him because of the evil report he gave of them towards their father. He played a little bit of a cat-and-mouse game with them. One minute, they thought they were going home, then the next minute, they weren’t. One minute, they were all going home, except one. And Joseph was kind of putting them through what they had put him through. And we saw that sin is not a superficial issue and it must not be dealt with in a speedy or superficial way in regards to forgiveness. In fact, I want to say this, forgiveness is a beautiful thing because sin is first recognized as an ugly thing. You will not appreciate the one without the other. You can’t appreciate the beauty of forgiveness until you have recognized the ugliness of sin.
And that’s why forgiveness cannot be the first response. In fact, we hinted at the fact last week, didn’t we? There’s such a thing as the sin of forgiveness. The sin of forgiveness. And that is when forgiveness minimizes sin, glosses over sin, superficially deals with sin. Forgiveness, biblically speaking, never minimizes the reality of sin. There is evil in ignoring evil. And so you and I need to be careful. Forgiveness is not necessarily the first response. In fact, confrontation is the facing of that sin, the owning of that sin. So, we looked at that last week. In fact, we took a little bit of an excursion and we tried to look at how you and I might confront in a balanced and biblical way. One thought here before we leave the thought of their sins were faced.
In this whole process of Joseph facing them with their sins, I think you see that their sins had come home like chickens to roost. Joseph confronted his brothers with their sins and they were faced with what we might call the law of reciprocity. We reap what we sow. Galatians 6:7, “You reap what you sow,” and that is fleshed out in a very dramatic way in the life of Joseph’s brothers. There’s no use sowing the seeds of sin and then praying for a crop failure. You will face your sins. You and I must remember that in a moral universe, we need to be aware of the boomerang effect of sin. That our sins tend to come back and bite us. That what we sow, we reap.
And Joseph replays their abusive and aggressive behavior towards him. He puts them through what they put him through and he gave them a little taste of their own medicine and they didn’t like it. And I want you to know this wasn’t done out of hatred. This was done out of love. This wasn’t an act of punishment. This was an act of mercy. The beauty of forgiveness would be known among them, but first, the ugliness of their sin had to be uncovered and faced and owned. Joseph was being cruel to be kind, and we see in this story that God will see to it that conscience and circumstance will work hand in hand to face us with our sins. Be sure, your sins will find you out and they will find you out.
In fact, I wrote this thought to myself this week just reflecting on this, “Do unto others what you would have them do unto you or God may just see to it that life will do to you what you wanted to do to others.” Sin has a way of coming back and biting us. In a moral universe, we have the boomerang effect of sin. What goes around, in God’s moral universe, comes around. In fact, you see this fleshed out in the life of Joseph’s father. You ever thought about this? Jacob deceived his father. Later on, as a father, he was deceived by his sons. Jacob deceived his father in connection with a favorite son, Esau. Jacob in turn was deceived about a favorite son, Joseph. Jacob used a goat skin to fool his father and goat’s blood was sprinkled on his son’s coat of many colors to deceive him.
What you sow you shall reap and you can find that again and again in the Bible. Pharaoh ordered male babies born to Jewish mothers drowned. Later, Pharaoh in his army were drowned in the Red Sea. David destroyed another man’s home through lust only to have his own family torn apart by similar passions from his own sons. Ahab caused Naboth to be slain and the dogs came to lick Naboth’s blood. When Ahab died in Samaria, the dogs licked his blood. I like the story of the man who visited the penitentiary and he went into one particular room and found that the prisoners were sitting with large needles and balls of twine and they were sewing these canvas bags together and he happened to say to one of the prisoners, “Sewing?” The prisoner looked at him and said, “No. Reaping.”
Galatians 6:7. But we move on. We not only see their sins were faced, we see that their sins were forsaken. Their wrong was to be feast and their wrong was to be forsaken. This is the second plank in mending the fence. Joseph sets out to establish the genuineness of their hearts’ repentance. The process seemed to have already begun. The ghosts of the past had been awakened. We read in chapter 42 in verse 21, as Joseph keeps Simeon and sends the rest of them home, “We are truly guilty concerning our brother for we saw the anguish of his soul when he pleaded with us and we did not hear him. Therefore, this distress has come upon us.” Their conscience has been awakened. There seems to be a softness now and a sensitivity that wasn’t there before, but is it going to go full circle? They have been faced with their sins, but will they forsake them? We find that they admit it, but will they quit it? That’s the issue.
And so, Joseph seeks to probe a little bit further, because forgiveness must never be mistaken for let’s just kiss and make up. Let’s let bygones be bygones. No, sin is too serious and forgiveness is too precious. A simple sorry won’t cut it in the world of real reconciliation. There needs to be a change of mind and an alteration of behavior. And so Joseph seeks to bring that about. I think Joseph has already forgiven them with the heart, but if he’s to forgive them with the hand, inviting them back into his life, he wants to establish that there’s been real repentance and real remorse. This is what we might call the difference between you and I granting someone forgiveness and them receiving it. You and I can grant forgiveness from the heart. This is what John MacArthur would call unilateral forgiveness.
You find it in the life of Stephen as he’s stoned to death. You find it in the life of Christ as he’s crucified to the cross. There’s that desire, that wish, that openness to forgive. There’s a difference between you and I granting forgiveness from the heart and getting rid of bitterness and resentment before God so that we can live our lives whether the person responds or not. But if they’re to receive it, if real reconciliation is to take place, then forgiveness needs to move from a unilateral dimension to a conditional dimension, in that they, the person who’s to receive it, must repent of the sin that indeed is being granted forgiveness towards. And I think you have this going on here in the life of Joseph.
Listen to these words by Warren Wiersbe. “From a human point of view, Joseph would’ve been happy for instant reconciliation.” Okay? It’s months between chapter 42 and chapter 45. He sends them back home, Simeon stays, then they come down with Benjamin and then the father has to come down. It would’ve been easy, would it not, to just say, “Hey guys, it’s Joseph.” But listen, from a human point of view, Joseph would’ve been happy for instant reconciliation because then he would’ve seen his father and his brother Benjamin much sooner. But like a skilled physician, Joseph was patient. He spoke and acted in such a way that the thoughts of his brother’s hearts were revealed and God finally brought them to true repentance. It’s the difference between what Paul calls godly sorrow, right, and, what, worldly sorrow.
Go with me quickly to 2 Corinthians, chapter seven, 2 Corinthians, chapter seven, and we’ll just note this difference, and Joseph certainly wasn’t going to settle for simple regret or shallow remorse. He wanted deep repentance. 2 Corinthians 7:10. “For godly sorrow produces repentance leading to salvation not to be regretted, but the sorrow of the world produces death.” What’s the difference? Well, on the one hand, there’s remorse, but it’s centered on self and it’s all about the consequences one finds oneself in because of one’s sin. That’s worldly sorrow. That’s your kid caught with their hand in the cookie jar and there’s a crocodile tears and there’s a simple sorry, but the real sorrow is they didn’t get the cookie and you kind of spoiled their plans. But that’s worldly sorrow.
It’s shallow. It’s self-centered. Doesn’t lead to life, it leads to death. It just produces more sins, deception, self-centeredness, but godly sorrow, that’s centered upon God’s glory, that’s fixed upon Christ, that’s real. It produces real repentance, anguish of soul, alteration of life. If you wanted to see those two things worked out, then look at Simon Peter who turned back to Christ in repentance while Judas turned away in remorse. Judas’ repentance was self-centered. It was all about the consequences. It was all about dreams spoiled and aspirations never reached. It was all about his own disgrace. But Peter, we read that he wept bitterly, went out, and sorted it out with the Lord, changed his ways and the next time Peter finds the Lord Jesus Christ, he sees him on the beach and Peter just … headfirst into the sea of Galilee. He’s got to get to the Savior.
Joseph isn’t about to settle for worldly sorrow. He’s looking for godly sorrow. And so to answer the question, Joseph engineers a test and follow me here, I’m going to take you quickly through a number of the passages. Now, the last time we left off, the brothers have headed home, right? Simeon’s in custody and Joseph isn’t going to believe their story until they bring their younger brother back, Benjamin. So, they go home and they tell their father what happened? How this governor spoke roughly to them, but he gave them food and they found the very money they were going to buy their food with in their bags.
And so they plead with Jacob to let Benjamin travel back with them so that they can prove that they’re not spies. There’s nothing going on here that’s subversive. But Jacob refuses, right? He’s not about to lose another son of Rachel. It may speak to even his lack of trust in his own sons. Maybe the years had produced certain suspicions in his mind and Reuben pleads with them here in chapter 42 in verse 36. “Jacob, their father said to them, “You’ve bereaved me. Joseph is no more. Simeon is no more and you want to take Benjamin. All these things are against me.” Then Reuben spoke to his father saying, “Kill my two sons if I do not bring him back to you. Put him in my hands and I’ll bring him back to you.” But he said, “My sons shall not go down with you for his brother is dead and he’s left alone. Any calamity should befall him along the way in which you go, then you would bring me down with gray hair and sorrow to the grave.”
Now, we don’t know how long the intervening period is, but they’ve got food. Simeon’s left in Joseph’s custody. Jacob’s not about to put Benjamin back into their custody, but what do we read at the beginning of chapter 43? Now, the famine was severe. I mean, at the end of the day, Jacob had no choice. I mean, here he is trying to preserve the life of Benjamin, but if he digs his heels in here, they’re all going to lose their lives. More food is needed. So, the journey needs to be undertaken again and he resigns to the inevitable and this time offers surety.
We read in verse 8 of chapter 43, then Judah said to Israel, his father, “Send the blood with me and we will arise and go, that we may live and not die, both we and you and also our little ones. I myself will be surety for him. From my hand, you can require it. If I do not bring them back to you and set him before you, then let me bear the blame/shame forever.” Now, what’s striking about that is what? Reuben, we understand. I mean, Reuben wasn’t in with both feet first time round. In fact, remember, he tried to talk the brothers out of it, but Judah. Now, this is a change. Why? Because Judah was the one that even suggested they sell Joseph into slavery. “Hey, what’s the point of killing him? Let’s make some money on him.”
But here you have Judah offering surety for Joseph’s younger brother, Benjamin, Rachel’s second son, and so they head down. We read again in chapter 43 and verse 30 that when the brothers come down and Joseph sees Benjamin, he can hardly contain himself. Chapter 43 verse 29. “Then he lifted his eyes and saw his brother Benjamin, his mother’s son, and said, “Is this your younger brother of whom you spoke to me?” And he said, “God, be gracious to you, my son.”” Now, his heart yearned for his brother. He wanted to say right there and then, “Hey, Benji, it’s me.” But why didn’t he?
Because sin is too serious and forgiveness is too precious to settle for something shallow or superficial. No worldly sorrow will do in the place of godly sorrow. And so Joseph restrains himself. In fact, we’ll read that he goes into his own chamber and weeps. I mean, in the thimble of language here we have a notion of emotion. This is dramatic stuff, but Joseph is holding it in because he realizes that while he has forgiven from the heart and while he’s willing to grant forgiveness, if they’re to receive forgiveness, there needs to be repentance and he needs to see evidence that it’s not shallow regret or remorse, but it’s deep repentance.
And so he seats them and he treats them to some hospitality. Look at this in verse 32. Now, what’s absolutely interesting about it is this. Let’s read it and I’ll make it clear to you. “So, they set him a place by himself and then by themselves and the Egyptians who ate with him by the themselves, because the Egyptian could not eat food with the Hebrews for that as an abomination to the Egyptians and they sat before him, that’s Joseph, the firstborn, according to his birthright and the youngest according to his youth, and the men looked in astonishment at one another.” What that text is saying is that they seated Joseph’s brothers from the oldest to the youngest in order. What a coincidence. Oh, yeah, there’s purpose here. There’s planning here. Joseph is probing. Joseph is setting out to see if the repentance is real and here’s what we read in verse 34. “Then he took servings to them from before him.” But Benjamin’s serving was what? Five times as much as any of theirs. What’s happening? Who’s getting special treatment? Benjamin.
And he wants to see how they react when someone is shown favor. He wants to see if anything has changed because his father showed him favor and now he wants to see if the brothers have changed in any way. If there’s going to be a change in the relationship, there’s got to be a change of heart on the part of those who have offended it. And you know what? There is no reaction, which is a good sign. There is change going on here. That early remorse. You know what? This is being visited on us. Poor me is morphing into, hold on a minute, you know what, if you think about it, we deserve this. And you know what? The Lord is bringing them through confrontation to conviction, so that they might enjoy compassion.
And so after this what happens? He sends the brothers home, right, with their bags full of green, but he slips, what, a silver cup in the Benjamin’s and they get so far up the road and Joseph’s guards go after them. They stop them. They accuse them of stealing. They’re all, “We stole nothing,” and neither they did. Joseph, again, planted the silver goblet of the cup in Benjamin’s bag. This is the final piece in the puzzle. This is the final part of the test, and Benjamin is charged stealing from Joseph and they know what that means. That means curtains. You don’t sit at an Egyptian lord’s table enjoying his hospitality and then take the silverware.
Here’s what happens. The brothers stick up for Benjamin this time. Nobody stuck up for Joseph. In fact, Judah is the one who argues for Benjamin, actually offers himself as the sacrificial lamb in Benjamin’s place. Look at verse 18 of chapter 44. “Then Judah came near to him, that’s Joseph,” and said, “Oh, my Lord, please let your servant speak a word in my Lord’s hearing and do not let your anger burn against your servant, for you’re even like Pharaoh.”” Scroll down to verse 33. “Now, therefore please let your servant remain instead of the lad as a slave to my Lord and let the lad go up with his brothers for how shall I go up to my father if the lad is not with me, lest perhaps I see the evil that would come upon my father. Please, don’t do this to Benjamin. Please, don’t do this because it would break my father’s heart.”
Wouldn’t you agree there’s repentance going on here? There’s genuine change that can be measured here. The test has helped Joseph to plumb the depth of their sorrow and it has helped them to measure the breadth of their anguish. Their wrong was being faced and their wrong was being forsaken. They owned their sin and they disowned their sin. And when Joseph saw that, we’ll see here momentarily, he opens his heart to them and I think you and I just want to be mindful of that. That sin must be forsaken. True repentance must take place if full forgiveness and complete reconciliation is to be known. In the immediate, you and I can offer a one-sided forgiveness. We can love our enemies and we can pray for those who despitefully use us and we can pray to God that he won’t charge their sins against them, as did Stephen, and we can indeed forgive them in our hearts. But we cannot forgive with our hand, even though we have forgiven with the heart, until the other person reaches out their hand in true repentance.
The beauty of forgiveness cannot really be known until the ugliness of sin is owned and disowned. Sin is too serious, forgiveness too precious to be wasted, and those who don’t mean what they say and don’t do what they promise. I think you’ve seen this fleshed out, haven’t you in the story of Pete Rose? I’m not a connoisseur of baseball to that degree, but it seems that every year since I’ve lived in the United States, when it comes around to that time of year for the National Baseball Hall of Fame picks, there’s always that discussion should Pete Rose be in it? Is he in it by now? Okay, he’s not in it yet, and the debate goes on and his record stands for itself as one of the great hitters of all time. But it became known, or at least a charge was made, that during his time both as a player and a manager, he was gambling, which was a direct violation of an emphatic rule of baseball that was in place since the infamous Black Sox scandal of 1919.
And for years, Pete Rose denied it and this cloud of suspicion hung over his head and nobody was about to argue for his entrance into the Hall of Fame until they had a sense if he was really genuine about his repentance, if he would come clean and be honest. Then in early 2004, Rose published the book, didn’t he? Maybe some of you have read it, where he admitted that he had bet on baseball. Although, the timing of the publication was interesting, it was around about the time that the Hall of Famers were being picked. Good seller, wouldn’t you agree? So, Pete Rose got to make some more money and that caused others to be cynical about him again, and while he admitted gambling, he still protested his innocence that he bet on games in which he himself and his own team were involved, although others even doubted that.
But when the confession came in the book, it came in these words. Listen. “I’m sure that I’m supposed to act all sorry or sad or guilty now that I’ve accepted that I’ve done something wrong, but you see I’m just not built that way. So, let’s leave it like this. I’m sorry it happened and I’m sorry for all the people, fans and family. Let’s move on.” I think we got an admission. I don’t think we got a confession. It was pretty shallow, wasn’t it? Not very sincere. Cost him nothing really. See, that’s worldly sorrow. That’s not godly sorrow.
But Joseph, I think, is encouraged and he’s ready to embrace his brothers in a dramatic moment here in chapter 45 because their wrong has been faced, their wrong has been forsaken and finally their wrong has been forgiven. The final plank when one sets out to mend the fence. Here we read in chapter 45, “Then Joseph could not restrain himself before all those who stood by him and he cried out, “Make everyone go out from me.” So, no one stood with him while Joseph made himself known to his brothers and he wept aloud and the Egyptians and the house of Pharaoh heard it.” It was a very private moment, but it was an emotional moment as Joseph orders his staff to leave the court, and I’m sure everybody’s heart skipped a beat as he told his brothers that indeed the man they had been dealing with was Joseph.
They must have stood there like frightened sheep. Their worst nightmare has just become a reality there. They stood probably shivering, stunned and silent, but into the silence the voice of Joseph speaks, “Hey, guys, don’t grieve. Don’t be angry. It’s not what you think. What you think’s going to happen is not going to happen and what you can’t imagine could happen is about to happen. I forgive you. God has sent me here to protect the posterity of Jacob in keeping in covenant with the Abraham. Guys, I’m going to tell you, go and get Papa. Bring him down. I’ve got a nice piece of real estate called Goshen. You’re going to like it. You bring the kids down, bring everything down. I’m going to provide for you. I’m going to protect you.” Utterly amazing. Grace ruled, love reigned, and forgiveness was offered and forgiveness was received.
It’s powerful. Quickly, because I’m sure time has already gone, but there’s two components to Joseph’s ability to forgive. I mean, he has faced them with their sin. Their chickens have come home to roast. They have felt the pain they inflicted him with that they could have turned towards remorse and a self-focus, but in God’s grace they turned in repentance, and in God focus, towards truly owning their sin. But still he had to forgive them, okay? He was at a place where I think he knew I can forgive them. The question is will he? We know he does. The question for us is how did he do it? Two component parts, if you’re taking notes. I think Joseph was conscious of God’s government and Joseph was conscious of God’s grace, and when you’re conscious of God’s sovereignty and your conscious of your utter unworthiness to receive God’s mercy, it prepares you to better forgive others.
God’s government. He was conscious of God’s government. Don’t you get that a number of times? Look at verse 45 of chapter 45, “But now do not therefore be grieved or angry with yourselves because you sold me here. For God sent me before you to preserve life.” Joseph was conscious of a hidden hand in all of the events of his life. We see the same thought in chapter 50. In fact, Jacob’s dead by the time we get to chapter 50 and the brothers are beginning to wonder, maybe Joseph’s forgiveness was really all about dad. Now that dad’s gone, he’s really no reason to forgive us and what’s coming to us will come to us. And Joseph allays their fears. He’s offended by the brothers again, coming groveling, and asking for forgiveness, and Joseph says in verse 19 of chapter 50, “Do not be afraid for am I in the place of God, but as for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good in order to bring it about as it is this day to save many people alive. Now, therefore do not be afraid. I will provide for you and your little ones.”
And he comforted them and spoke kindly to them. The upward pull of God’s sovereignty lifted Joseph out of the pit of resentment in which he could have so easily languished. In fact, he was able to see them as instruments in the hands of God, bringing him to a place that not only secured his future but secured their future. That’s a staggering thought. When you and I can grasp within the sovereignty of God that that which others do to us, the offenses that we bear, the wrongs that are done toward us, still all fit into a greater plan that enables us to deal with resentment, with bitterness. It enables us indeed to forgive more quickly. We can only move past our past when we embrace what we have just gone through as part of a plan. And if you can’t get there, you won’t get anywhere, until you get there because you’re going to get stuck on that event, that experience, that encounter, and you won’t get past your past until you can embrace the thought that that hurt, that sin, that event, that disloyalty, that betrayal, that abuse is still under the sovereign hand of God and, although it is an evil in and of itself, the great alchemist can make it all work together for our good.
In fact, R.T. Kendall who used to teach a Westminster Chapel in his book on forgiveness said this quote, “Although we often do not see this at first, but all of our bitterness is ultimately traceable to resentment towards God.” You think about it, I think there’s truth there. You mightn’t admit that and in fact you mightn’t think deeply enough to grasp that. But if you reflect on it and you think deeply for a moment, you’ll see that’s true. The real issue is not what they did. The real issue is, Lord, why did you allow them to do it? And while you’re bitter towards others, there is a hidden resentment towards God. Why would you, God, and your love put me through this?
And so forgiveness really becomes an issue of what you and I believe about the sovereignty of God and the purposes of God and the providence of God. In fact, I’ll say this. Demands strong faith. Write that down. Forgiveness demands strong faith. Forgiveness is not just an issue of grace, it’s an issue of trust. I got this from Gerald Sittser whose writings have really impacted me, whose writings I commend to you. In fact, he lost his wife and his children to a drunk driver. His book on bereavement and grief is tremendous called Grace Disguised. You’ve read it, Phil, I think’s ministered to you. It’s a great book. But in another book of his called Across the Differences, he says this, quote, “Paying the high cost of forgiveness demands strong faith. Faith enables us to believe that God is still God, able to bring good out of evil, however painful the evil has been.”
Joseph’s brother sold him as a slave to merchants on caravan to Egypt. Joseph suffered for years from their jealous betrayal. Yet in the end, he could say you meant it for evil, but God meant it for good. God is a master storyteller. He’s able to weave a plot for our lives that uses evil for a greater purpose. God is able to make all things right, however wrong they seem to be. His grace leads to a life of no regrets. He is so great that he can turn ashes into bread, a desert into a fertile field, suffering into triumph. It takes time for him to do his great work. Of course, only faith will sustain us as we wait for God to heal and restore. That is a mighty quote.
It takes strong faith to forgive. I mean, Joseph’s forgiving in a sense … that’s not to minimize, certainly not to minimize in any way. Joseph’s forgiving them now with the hindsight of how God has worked it all together for good and that enables him to say, “Hey, hold on a minute. Don’t be afraid. I see what God’s been up to.” But even when you and I don’t get that privilege, you and I need to trust God enough to still forgive even when we’re not sure how it all makes sense and how it all works together.
Here’s the second thought and we’re done. The wrong was forgiven because Joseph was conscious of God’s government and Joseph was conscious of God’s grace. He’s already given testimony to that fact how, “God has sent me ahead to preserve life.” We saw, remember, in the naming of his two sons to the daughter of Potiphar that, “God has made me fruitful in the land of my affliction and God has made me to forget all that I’ve gone through. I can see in all of this the hand of God, his goodness and his mercy. I’m indeed a blessed man.” He knows the grace of God and the goodness of God to that degree. And although we have acknowledged that the text of Genesis attributes and applies no sin to Joseph’s record, you and I are not theologically stupid enough to believe that he didn’t sin, right? We’ve all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.
And so Joseph himself has often sought God for forgiveness and we want to believe that he believes that he has received it. And I think when Joseph extends this forgiveness to his brothers, I think he does it in this kind of spirit. I am a forgiven sinner. Here are sinners in need of my forgiveness. I am a forgiven sinner and here are sinners in need of my forgiveness. Remember what we said at the start? Forgiveness is the obligation of those who are forgiven. Forgiven people are to be forgiving people. As Christ Jesus has forgiven us, we ought to forgive one another. Father forgive us our debts as we forgive those who have trespassed against us.
We won’t turn to this because time won’t allow us. The greatest example of that, remember, is the story Jesus tells in Matthew 18:21, the whole issue of forgiveness. And he tells that story of the guy who’s in debt, right, to the king and the king wants to settle his accounts. And so he pulls him in. You know what? And he asked him to pay up 10,000 talents. Okay, that’s a tremendous amount of debt. I’ll tell you how I know that. A common laborer in those days would have to work 20 years to make one talent. Rome only collected 800 talents a year in taxes from the five Jewish regions of Judea, Samaria, Galilee, Perea, and Adami.
So, Jesus is telling the parable in a very exaggerated form. The point is this, this guy owed ton of stuff. In fact, Haddon Robinson in his book on the Sermon on the Mount estimates that it could be something like $30 million, okay? He hasn’t got it. The king threatens to throw him and his kids and his wife in jail. He pleads and pleads and the king out of the goodness of his heart waives the debt and settles the account. You know the story, right? He goes out and he does what? He goes and finds a friend who owes him 30 bucks. 30 bucks. Just a hundred denarius, and he wants his pound of flesh and he throttles this guy and squeezes his neck. “Where is it?”
And you’re reading this through and you’re kind of laughing. There’s an absurdity to it, but it’s really not that laughable because the jokes on you and me. The jokes on anybody who goes to the cross takes the grace of God, paid in the blood of Jesus Christ, takes the best of heaven that was given for us and then goes out from the presence of God. “Father, forgive me my debts, but I’m not going to forgive others their debts.” And Jesus is having none of it. I don’t know what the meaning of the punishment of that man is in relation to the Christian, but I know this, God can’t stand a Christian who acts that way. And in fact, in extreme cases, that person can’t be a Christian. That’s Jesus’ argument, isn’t it? At the end of the Lord’s prayer, “Hey, if you don’t forgive others and you’re asking God to forgive you, no way.”
The point is a simple one. You and I will forgive to the degree that we’re humbled before the cross and we preach the gospel to ourselves every single day and we marvel at the amazing nature of God’s grace. If we’re there when people offend us, it won’t be so hard to forgive them. I don’t think forgiveness is ever easy, but in the light of God’s government and in light of God’s grace, you and I can more easily forgive. Maybe we could forgive like Corrie ten Boom, buried not too far from here, from this church, who after the war, after she was released from German custody and her time in Ravensbrück, learned some weeks after the allied victory of the man who betrayed her family to the Gestapo. And she sat down and wrote him a letter.
Her first reaction was to write him a letter and here’s what she said…and we’re done. This is a long quote, but it’s worth listening to. “Dear Sir. Today, I hear that most probably you were the one who betrayed me. I went through 10 months of concentration camps. My father died after 10 days, my sister after 10 months. What you meant to be harmful? God used for my good.” It’s an echo, isn’t it, of just what we read. “I’ve become closer to him. A severe punishment is awaiting you. I have prayed for you that the Lord will accept you if you turn to him. Think about the fact that God, the Lord Jesus carried your sins to the cross. If you accept that and will be his child, you will be saved forever. I have forgiven you everything. God will forgive you everything, also, if you ask him. He loves you and he himself has sent his son a to earth to forgive you your sins. That is to bear the punishment for you and me.” Did you notice how she lumped herself into his category? Saw herself as him?
“From your side? And answer must be given when he says, “Come to me, give your heart, then your answer must be yes, Lord, I will.” If you have difficulty praying, ask then if God will give you his spirit, he works the faith in your heart. Never doubt the love of Jesus, he stands with his arms wide open to receive you. I hope that the hard road that you now have to go will bring you to our eternal Savior.” She was conscious of God’s government. What you meant for harm, God used for good, and she was conscious of God’s grace. The one who bore my sin, bore your sin, the Calvary’s cross. If you have any fences to mend, I trust that these two studies will be a help in the mending process.
Let’s pray. Lord, we do come this evening into your presence, and, again, we thank you for our journey with Joseph. We thank you at so many points along the road we can identify with him. We thank you that the New Testament reminds us that the Old Testament saints and their stories have been written as examples to us. Their faith speaks to our faith. And Lord, we thank you for the encouragement to seek full reconciliation with those who have offended us. We realize, oh, God, forgiveness is the trademark of Christianity and the birthmark of Christians.
And God help us to be those who forgive or help us indeed to learn from the process here. And Lord, may we find the power to forgive as Joseph did in your sovereignty and in your grace. Help us to trust you enough to forgive others their offense. And we pray for those in our lives we wish to forgive where we want to grant them forgiveness, the question is will they receive it? Lord, we pray that you would do that work of repentance and conviction in their hearts so that through us or through these messages, husbands and wives may be restored, parents and children reconciled, friends who have been estranged brought back together again. Lord, life is too short to keep long accounts. For we ask and pray these things in Jesus’ name. Amen.